While I should be studying for an interview on Thursday, this blog site of mine has been collecting way too much dust for me to leave it untouched. So here’s my attempt to give something new to you all today — whenever you read this.

If, by any chance, you are reading this after the 30th of May, then the stress of my upcoming second-round job interview may be over. Depending on if I make it to the third and final round. Technical interviews aren’t my strong suit, so I’ve been worrying about what I need to improve.

The title of this post has nothing to do with the worry about the interview I have, but it has been something that I feel the need to say out loud. More so for my positive mental health in this matter. But there were days when I thought I wasn’t good enough to call myself a writer. Where imposter syndrome or just total self-doubt would come in place, and I wonder why I still write in the first place, no one was reading what I was writing at all. I’m also not talking about my blog here; I appreciate everyone who takes the time to read any of my posts here. I’m talking more about the stories I have been writing or the rare occasion of a poem.

This negative energy I would bring to myself would leak out to Yessica. I would tell her that I’m dealing with the feeling that I’m not a writer, and she would try her best to support me by telling me that I am. Well, that positive reinforcement from her would eventually run out of fuel; but not my woes on the matter, because she would give me the hard truth that she could only do so much to support me and the rest is up to me.

When I heard it, I wasn’t mad or upset at her (I really shouldn’t be); I agreed. If this were earlier when I started writing when she would have said this, then this would’ve hurt, and I felt more of a lack of support. But it has been over a year now, and she was tired of hearing me downplaying myself on this, “I’m not a writer,” or, “These people are so much better than I am,” rants. And that was what I needed to hear from her, that she had done all she could to remind me that I was a writer, that I just needed to stop bringing myself down and say proudly that I am a writer.

I am a writer!

It always feels good saying it.