I’ll be putting this in the order of importance that I feel my teenage self needs to hear.

Grow up

Just grow up, Brad. You try so hard to be the funny kid who thinks getting into trouble was being cool, but years later, you’ll be sitting in your chair at your home office, and your face will scrunch up and cringe because you realized how much of an asshat you actually were. You think getting detention and getting yourself benched at the next volleyball game are signs of being cool? Trust me, the people sitting behind you, the game you were benched for, were sending you daggers for the stupidity you caused. You weren’t cool, let me tell you. You were still a teen, but kids half your age were acting more mature than you were.

Just be glad you didn’t meet your wife then.

Let go of your ego

You’re a great athlete. Maybe not the best, but you need to accept that and consider the offers that you had.

For soccer: Yes, you did not get scholarships to play soccer in college, but you did get calls from schools in your area that wanted you to play for them. They were Division III colleges, and that should’ve been enough for you to know that you were good for those colleges. It took me until my thirties to understand, and I wish my teenage self had known that starting at a Division III college playing soccer didn’t mean I couldn’t move up to a Division II or even Division I school. I could’ve played more soccer and earned that scholarship, but I thought that was it.

For volleyball: Yes, you may have thought that you were the best hitter on your team, but your coach put you as a setter for a reason: your passing abilities. Don’t give this “I don’t care” attitude because you didn’t want to be the setter anymore. It turns out, you were pretty good at setting; you just didn’t want to accept that, and you had a bruised ego because your coach didn’t place you as a hitter. Who knows how you would’ve turned out if you had taken the setter role more seriously.

Cut your losses on so-called “friends”

There are some people you go to high school with whom you should just not bother talking to. Take your neighbor. You grew up with him for many years and considered him a friend. However, over the years, you realized that friendship was a one-way street. Many hangouts led to him inflicting mental and physical pain on you. Why hang out with someone who is taking a BB gun, loading it with spitballs, and letting them shoot you within five feet? Or, take your brother’s slingshot and fire pennies at you? Why laugh like “Oh, he’s just a jokester,” when you find out his pubic hair was sitting on top of your head during class, and the person talking to you was just laughing at your face?

I don’t know what he’s doing with his life, but thankfully, it’s far away from me.

Another friend you have spent a few summers with. And I mean all of your summer with. You laughed, you cried, you got into random phases like dressing up as the people from the movie, You Got Served. But there comes a year in high school, they move on from you, and you don’t know why. That was someone you shouldn’t have wasted any years with, when all they have done was bring you down. You try on an outfit and think you look good? Not to them, you don’t. Oh, you thought you were good enough to be the starter of the travel soccer team? Think again! They tell you the only reason you got to start was that your dad threatened the coach. Don’t believe that statement—you definitely earned your spot on the roster, he just hated seeing you shine.

Let them go. You’ll be much better off without them.

Give writing a try

This is not me saying that this is your calling. But, throughout the years, you dabble some of your time into writing, why not put some more attention to that? You write little stories here and there, you play with made-up scenarios in your head, you should give it a go. There’s still a high you can remember back in the 5th grade, when your teacher handed you back your assignment of writing a story, and you got an A+ on it. I honestly don’t remember how the story went, but it was good enough to get a perfect score on it!

Fifteen years later, you focus more of your time on writing. You’re even writing a little post answering questions about what advice you’d give to your teenage self. So give it a go!

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